Growing up, whenever I hit a growth spurt, I'd have these terrible pains in my body that would last for longer than I could stand. The pain would come suddenly, and be so intense, that I wouldn't want to get out of bed. My mother took me to the pediatrician, and he diagnosed me with "growing pains." There was no "cure," and the only recommendation he had was to take Tylenol to help me bear the pain.
This is what this time period of my life feels like- however, I'm not interested in numbing the pain because I'd miss the lessons.
This current pain didn't actually come out of nowhere... It's been building with each time I ignored the inclinations that the universe provided me with. Up until now, I preferred to do things my way in this particular area. During this Full Moon energy in Taurus, the universe decided to send me a gentle reminder of who's boss, and as the Jamaicans say, "those who cyan('t) hear, feel!"
So here I am, sitting in this lesson, feeling the pain of what started in the ego as anger, victimhood, and brattiness- and quickly transformed into embarrassment, fear, and guilt, which came with the realization that I've been irresponsible with my relationship with the universe.
Universe, I hear and feel the lesson loud and clear. I am deeply sorry, and I won't do it again. I am committed to listening to you the first time around, I'm committed to trusting my intuition, and I'm committed to acting on what comes up for me, even if at the moment it doesn't feel great. Thank you for this lesson at this stage of my life.
I am grateful for this growth spurt, and the ability to heal the things that are going against what I'm co-creating with the universe.
<3 <3 A vulnerable, powerful, courageous leader <3 <3